(Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters, or the whole MST idea. Any comments made about the author aren't meant to be hurtful in anyway, it's just for fun. The author of this badfic is Rebecca.
Mild swearing warning, but nothing earth shattering. If you can watch TV, you can read this.)
Callista appears on screen.
Callista: Prepare yourselves for the worst piece of fan fiction you will ever read! (maniacal laughter)
Jaina (whispers to Luke): Is she on something?
Luke: Knowing Callista, she probably is.
Callista: I leave you to your piteous fate! (more maniacal laughter)
Lowie: That was an experience.
Jacen: I guess you could call it that.
The text begins to scroll down the screen.
>>Raynar walking throu jungle eating a bannana wen he gets eatin by somthin.
Mara: Poor Raynar. He seemed like such a nice kid too.
Luke: Recently yeah, but before he was this little brat that couldn't go two seconds in a lecture without asking some stupid question. And I'm not even going to get into the rainbow robe thing he had going on.
Mara: Rainbow robe?
Lowie: Trust me, you do *not* want to know.
>> Tennel ka walking throu jungle when she slips on raynars bannana peel & break her neck.
Anja: Tenel Ka, with your being dead and all, does this mean Jacen's available now?
Tenel Ka: Sorry Anja, but in the event of my death Jacen will become the property of one of my cousins.
Tenel Ka: What else? I am from Danthomir, you know.
Jacen (gulps): Okay. . .
>> Jacens crystal snake gets loose & bites jaina.
>>Jaina was working on dangerous machens wen snake bite her. Jaina fall asleep
Jaina: Amazing because the last time I was bitten by a crystal snake it gave me the ability to fly.
Jaina: Sarcasm, honey, sarcasm.
>> Jacen finds his crystal snake & jaina & the machine blows up & kills both of em.
Jacen: Well that sucks.
Jaina: `Nuff said. Let us move on.
>> Lowies computer has an error & blows up on lowie.
Lowie: The likely hood of such a thing ever happening is of course none, but if I'm dead then I don't see why I should have to read anymore.
Luke: Not so fast Lowie, you're not leaving us again.
Lowie: That's what you think, Jedi Master sasquatch.
Luke: Now I'm really confused.
Mara: Nothing unusual there.
>> Zekk finds smothing & it's poisones.
Zekk: I never get the cool deaths.
Jaina: That's because the authors know if they *ever* harm you they'll have to answer to me. . . and my lightsaber.
>> Raynar & tennel ka & jacen & jaina & lowie & zekk dead
>> Anja alive.
Tenel Ka: What sorry ending.
Mara: You know, if we didn't comment on that sort of thing the authors wouldn't think they had to put in an epilogue!
Tenel Ka: You would assume that to be true. Shame it isn't.
>> Anja get struck by lightning.
Tenel Ka: I like that ending better.
Jacen: I'm inclined to agree.
Jaina: Me too.
Zekk: I think it's the best one so far.
Lowie: Definitely one of the better bad fics.
Luke: Since I wasn't in it, it can't hurt me.
Mara: Or me. And I did like the second ending.
Anja: I hate you all.
Tenel Ka: Don't worry Anja, I can assure you the feeling is entirely mutual.
Callista appears on screen
Callista: Well? Didja hate it?
Jacen: Actually, we think it's one of the better ones you've sent us.
Mara: Honestly Callie, you're not going to get anyone to marry you if that's all you're gonna throw at us.
Callista: Fine then, the next one will be the worst one ever!
Luke: Didn't she say that last time?
Jaina: Probably did.
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