MST: Anja Finally Dies For Good(Thank God)
By: Jaina Green

Anja Finally Dies For Good(thank God) By me, Jaina Green. A little swearing, but nothing horrible. I wrote this at SAT time, so it sucks really really bad. Read on if you dare.

The group of Jacen, Jaina, Lowie, Tenel Ka, Zekk, Anja, Luke, and Mara wake up and find themselves in the same fanfiction-from-hell void they've been in for months.

Jaina:No, don't tell me we're still here! It's been so damn long!!!

Zekk: the only worse thing would be if Leonardo DiCaprio showed up.

Leonardo DiCaprio drops from the sky and lands on a still-sleeping Jacen. Zekk sighs defeatedly.

Zekk: I knew that was going to happen. Somehow I just figured that if I said that, 2nd-rate actors would just fall from the sky....

Mara: We must be in hell.

Callista appears, smiling evilly and holding a packet of paper in her hands.

Callista: Here it is. I think you might end up liking this one. Anja dies.

Jaina: YAY!!!

Tenel Ka: YAY!!!

Anja: I love you guys, too.

Jacen: Maybe the author has more of a brain then we think.

Lowie:From the other fanfics we've read, I highly doubt it.

Zekk: Yeah, we always end up getting screwed one way or another.

Leonardo DiCaprio: Where am I?

Mara&Luke in unison: Hell.

Callista: are you going to babble all day, or read the damn story?

Lowie: Do we actually have that choice?

Callista: No.

Jaina: I actually want to read this one. I can't wait to see you die, Anja.

Anja: Up yours.

>>>>Anja Finally Dies For Good(thank God)

Jaina: I love the title.

>>>>One morning Anja tries to seduce Zekk and Jacen. Jaina and Tenel Ka sees and begin to plot revenge.

Tenel Ka: Ooh, this is good.

Jaina: I love this already.

>>>>We should kill her Jaina says there's no other solution.

Zekk: That'sone of the smartest things I've ever seen this author write.

Jaina: Now only if they could grasp the concepts of grammar and punctuation....

>>>>We will hack her to pieces with our lightsabers Tenel Ka say Then dump all her spice into the river.

>>>>We dump her spice first while she's tied to a chair then we unmercifully subject her to repeated showings of Titanic and every time that ugly Leonardo DiCaprio dude comes on we pause the screen for 15 minutes.

Mara: I hate Anja, but I'm not sure I could be that cruel.

Luke: Titanic? That's a fate worse than death!!!!

Leonardo DiCaprio: I'm not ugly, I'm handsome and rich, and

Zekk: Arrogant, and annoying,and a bad actor, and one ugly son of a bitch.

Jaina: Use the 25,000,000 you earned on Titanic to buy yourself a new face.

Leonardo DiCaprio: Stupid slut, I oughta-----

Zekk: Hey! Nobody talks to Jaina like that! Shut up or I'll kick your prissy little ass!!

Jacen: Ooh, can I help? Pretty please?

Mara: We'll all help. Getting rid of Leonerdo DiCraprio is a favor to the universe.

Luke: It's our duty as Jedi to rid the Universe of all evil and bad actors.

Leonardo DiCaprio: Get me outta here, Please!!!!

>>>>That willtake to long and i cant stand Leonardo DiCaprio Tenel Ka say so lets do the Titanic thing once and then chop her carcass to bits.

Jaina: I am loving this. The author is a genius!

Zekk: Do you love this more than you love me?

Jaina: No, not quite, but it's a close second.

Zekk kisses Jaina, much to the dismay of Anja.

Anja: Do I ever get any good moments in these damn tings?

Mara: I hope not.

Lowie: If things seem to follow their regular pattern, then no.

Tenel Ka: This story is brilliant. The best thing I have ever read.

Anja: I feel so loved.

Jacen: Don't.

>>>>Jaina and Tenel Ka go and look for Anja that druggie whore is probably trying to get into Zekk's pants now but when we get done with her she wpn't be getting into anything anymore cuz shellbe dead Jaina say. Tenel Ka finds Jacen and Anja making out in the bushes and drags her out okay whore you will die now she say. Yeah Jaina say a long and horrible death.

Tenel Ka: Jacen, if you ever make out with Anja again, not only will I kill you, I will neuter you too.

Jacen: But I didn't do it, really!!

Jaina: According to the story you did.

Lowie: Do I even appear in this one, or can I just leave now?

Anja: I need a fix.

Jaina: And I need a ship of my own, but you don't see me getting it, do you? Damn druggie whore.

Anja: I hate you, slut.

Jaina: I hate you too.

Anja: Hey Leo, wanna hook up?

Leonardo DiCaprio: Me-ow.

Luke: I think I'm gonna be sick.

>>>>Jaina ties Anja to a chair and brings ot a big screen T.V. Titanic is put in and Anja screams for mercy as the tape is stopped on DiCaprio's face NOOOOOO!!!! she shrieks NOT AGAIN!!! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD MAKE IT STOP!!!!!!!!!!!

Luke: Could this author please stop with the repeated exclamation marks? Please?


Luke: I had to ask.

Anja: This story sucks.

Leonardo: I agree.

Jaina: How do you like this story, Tenel Ka?

Tenel Ka: Why couldn't all these fanfics be this good?

>>>>>>Jaina laughs sadistically as she presses pause again This is for trying to get at my boyfriend you bitch she say

Zekk: This story just keeps getting better and better.

Jacen: Yeah. No negative comments here.

Leonardo: This is bullshit.

Anja: I will kill this author when I find them.

>>>>Titanic ends and Anja cries as her spice is thrown into the river. NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Luke: Dammit, stop the exclamation marks!



Anja: All of you go to hell.

Zekk: After this story, you'll be going first.


Jacen: Nice malevolent laughter.

Jaina&Tenel Ka in unison: Thank You.

Leonardo DiCaprio: Someone shoot me.

Zekk: Gladly.

Zekk pulls out a blaster and shoots Leonardo DiCaprio seventeen time in the head and chest. Everyone cheers.

Jaina: My hero...

Jaina kisses Zekk passionately as a reward for killing Leonardo DiCaprio and ridding the universe of another bad actor.

Anja: Damn, my life sucks.

>>>> Finally out of decency Jaina and Tenel Ka kill Anja by decapitation using their lightsabers only once and hanging her head above Master Skywalker's mantle as a trophy.

THE END, Fine, Fin, Adios Amiegos

Jaina: That was the best story I have ever read and I want copies made for all my friends and realatives.

Zekk:You killed Anja! My hero...

Jaina and Zekk go into a long, unnecessary make-out scene as the others listen to Anja rant and rave about the injustices of the story.


Lowie: Well, for starters, you were born...

Anja: Shut up.

Jacen: You carried around a lightsaber, and you weren't a Jedi...

Anja: Shut up.

Mara: You were a member of Black Sun...

Anja: Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!!!!!!

Tenel Ka: You tried to kill Han Solo for something he didn't do....


Luke: and you often use repeated exclamation marks.


Anja explodes from too much anger.


Luke runs over to check on her.

Luke: She's dead.

Everyone bursts into delighted cheers as Anja's bloody remains drip down the walls. Callista appears again.

Callista: Good. The story had the effect I was hoping for. Did you like it?

Jaina and Zekk stop making out long enough for Jaina to give a thumbs up.

Zekk: The greatsest one yet.

Jacen: I loved it. But now that Anja's dead, who will be killed?

Callista glances evilly at Mara.


So how bad was it? Tell me please, I need the critisism. Some serious fanfics from me coming, as well as a possible sequel to this one.... e-mail me at:

Send feedback to the author here.